Twelfth Entry: What I learned in life, I learned in PERSEF1

1. The most meaningful modules that were discussed in PERSEF1 is "Love"(specifically relationships with the opposite sex) and "Career Planning".

During the discussion about love (relationship with the opposite sex), there were some things that I found out that I thought are not true about the thoughts of boys, but they really are. Like Pre-marital sex is okay as long as they do it safely or PDA is okay as long as they know their limitations. I guess I was being naive about it. It has been mentioned to me a million times, yet I did not believe that all guys are ike that. But after hearing the thoughts of the guys on our block, I guess I'll have to assume that all guys do think the same. Of course, I know there ARE who think otherwise... but the chances that I'll meet someone like that is 1 in a gazillion!! hehe...

The discussion about Career Planning really made me think of what my future will be. At first I thought that I'll be doing programming for the rest of my life. But after the discussion... I thought, "how sad my life would be if I lived like that." I heard discussions about how other people would open up a business after some time. I thought, "why shouldn't I do that?" So now, not only will I become a programmer, but also a businesswoman as well. Yeay!

2. During the discussions in PERSEF1, I was able to ask myslef questions such as "Am I a good citizen?", "Do I really have what it takes to become a leader?", "Do I really know what to be in the future?", "Am I ready to be in a relationship?", and so on... Before, my asnwers to these questions were kind of unstable. I'd probably answer, "Mabye" or "I guess". But throught the discussions, though I am not YET 100% confident of my answers, I now have an idea if I am a good citizen, if I got what it takes to become a good leader, what I want to be in the near future, if I am ready to be in a relationship... :D

3. The groupings in PERSEF class made me improve my skills with people. This is because, at first, my groupsmates were not really my ideal ones. I wanted to be grouped with certain persons in the block. But through the groupings, evrytime I'd be grouped with not-so-ideal people, I'd think, "Why not? It's worth a try to work with these people. Plus, the more people I'd get to know. How fun!" :D

4. Through the discussions we've had, I was able to reflect and define about I really am. I was able to discover new things that I didn't know was in me. And was also able reflect more on how to be a better me. Now, I can say that I like the new me and...

There's no one else I'd rather be but me. :D

Eleventh Entry: It's Time for some action! (My Action Plan)

I wasn't able to attend most of our discussion for our last meeting for the term (huhu...) because of an interview. But I was able to participate in a small part of the activity.

MY ACTION PLAN
As a result of the learning and the insights I gained on ethical leadership, situational leadership, and making a difference.

I plan to do the following:

PERSONAL:
I will stop...- degrading myself
I will start...- thinking of better ways to boost my confidence

MY SCHOOL:
I will stop...- cramming :(
I will start...- joining organizations

Tenth Entry: Born to be a Leader (Leadership)

I remember myself as kid. I've always wanted to become the President of the Philippines. This is because there are times when I hear in the news about how there are so many corrupt politicians and I would always ask to myself, Bakit napaka-makasarili naman nila! Di ba nila alam marami ang nadadamay dahil sa ginagawa nila? Pano kaya kung sila yung nasa sitwasyon ng mga taong inaapi nila! Kung president lang ako hindi ako sisiguraduhin kong matatanggal sila kagad. Of course, I was a kid that time. It all seems so easy to do.

But everyone has the right to lead... so why not? Well, just because everyone has the right to lead doesn't mean that everyone CAN lead. That explains all those corrupt leaders from my childhood (even up til now). These leaders don't have the qualities to lead yet they are put in position.

It's really a pity... Well, maybe not pity, but it is sad that here in our country, majority of the people here base leadership on the person's popularity, not on their experience or background. I'd really wish these people would open their eyes!!! Leadership is based on their ability to lead, not on their popularity or charm!!!
And to those wanting to be leaders, I really wish that they would think of their real objective. They're getting so much power and responsibility, it's not a joke to becoming a leader. So much lives are placed into your hands, each of which you are supposed to take care of.

Even with this much in my mind, I'm still hoping that someday I'll somehow be able to lead the country... :D

Ninth Entry: Hail to thee our Alma Mater! (Characteristics of a Good School)

Our discussion for this meeting was about the Characteristics of a Good School. In my opinion, La Salle IS a good school. I'm not just saying just because I'm in it. It's because, in the short time that I've been here in La Salle, I was already able to see the characteristics described in the discussion and maybe more.

I guess the characteristic that really made an impact on me is that La Salle made it sure that that their students will feel welcome. Before graduating, we were always told that college will be really hard. That you have to learn to be indepedent. But La Salle made it sure that we will not be shocked and gave us time to adjust to college by keeping the freshmen in just one block for the first term.

So we were asked to draw a symbol of our ideal school:

The symbol represents La Salle which guides us and gives us light. It also symbolizes to keep our spirits "burning" even when surrounded by darkness.

Eight Entry: Proud to be Pinoy... and a Lasallian! (Citizenship)

Today's topic: Citizenship.

Well, it's not just citizenship on the country you reside on, but also the little communities you are in. Like being in La Salle or being in s18.

In the discussion, everybody agrees that being a good citizen means thinking of what is good for all, if not, the majority. But as the discussion goes on, being a good citizen is more than just thinking of what is for the good of all. There are some charachteristics of being a good citizen that should also be considered.

A good citizen should have:
1. Knowledge - on Current Events, legal and political systems, history and geography of the country, etc.
2. Values/Attitudes - treating oneself and others with respect, being able to deal with conflicts, loyalty to the nation, etc.
3. Skills - democratic participation, study and inquiry, and Intellectual skills

As much as I want to be a good citizen, I really have problems when it comes to being updated on current events. I try to, but the current event that I always get is who died in the car crash or who's dating who. I really don't trust the news in TV today. But I guess I shouldn't be blaming others when it's my responsibility. I really should exert more effort when it comes to being updated with the current events.

We were also asked to share out thoughts on the quotes on our hand-outs.

Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country. (JFK)

Everybody today is complaining what a failure the government is. Yet that is all we do... complain. We don't even try to do something. Even if we do, it's still for our own interest or the interest of the minor. It's not exactly thinking of what you can do for your country. It's time that we all do something for our country. If not, it's better that we all shut our mouths and stop complaining and leave the rest to the government.

Seventh Entry: When I grow up I want to be... (Career Planning - continuation)

For this meeting, we were supposed to ask a college graduate with a job which is the same with the one we desire. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to interview a graduate who has the same job that I want in the near future, which is, actually, anything that has something to do with the course that I am taking (Computer Science). I guess this is because I don't want to get a job that has nothing to do with what I studied for. I want to use everything that I have learned on the job that I am going to have. But then I remembered that I would also like to open up my own business after or while still being a programmer(hopefully), since I don't want to spend the rest of my life sitting in front of a computer (hehe).

I wasn't able to interview someone with a business, but my mom is a financial planner and sells insurance. It's not the same business I had in mind, but I was able to get some tips from her job that might be applicable to the business that I want, since there are times when I get to help with her work.

I guess the first thing that is applicable to the business that I want (which is opening a clothing store) is being a people-person. I guess that's applicable to all businesses. How can you entice people to buy from your business if you don't have interaction with them. That is what I am trying to improve at the moment, my interaction with people (specifically my blockmates). So far, I am getting along well with everybody in the block. Which is a good sign that I am doing well in being a people-person. It's a start!

Sixth Entry: When I grow up I want to be... (Career Planning)

Our discussion for this meeting was about Career Planning. We answered questionnaires that had something to do with our future career.

The first questionnaire was supposed to check how we see our education as a stairway to success. In the first place, education does not guarantee an indiviual's success, although it is a BIG advantage. It's really about how hardworking you are and how you face the different situations you face. I also believe that the job that you get after gradutating does not indicate what your career will be for the rest of your life. Like me, even though I would like to be a programmer in the near future, I don't see myslef to be doing it for the rest of my life. I plan on opening my own business at some point in my life. I've always wanted to open up my own clothing store. Or maybe a small gift shop.

Then we had another questionnaire that was supposed to tell what kind of job fits us: Data-oriented, People-oriented, or Things-oriented. To my surprise, the kind of job that fits me is People-oriented. It was a surprise because even though I've always wanted to have a People-oriented job, I was always described as the quiet type of person. Of course, it's hard to maintain a People-oriented job if you're quiet. But then we answered another questionnaire that was supposed to tell if we were an internal or an external kind of person. The last time I took this kind of test, there was a big difference between the internal and external. My internal was 20+, while my external was 5. This time I was now balanced! Another shocker... But then lot of people has seen a change in my personality compared to before. Now, they've seen that I have improved and saw that I've become more outspoken than I was before. I'm not the quiet, cry-baby Stephanie anymore. I'm now the New and Improved Stephanie... :D

With the new discovery I've seen in myself, I think it'll be easier for me to find out what will be the career that's in store for me.

Fifth Entry: All you need is LOVE! <3 (Love Relationships)

Our fifth week was VERY interesting. It was about LOVE!
We first discussed about what love is and then the different issues regarding a relationship with the opposite sex. To make the discussion more clear, the room was divided into two: the boys and the girls.

Love covers three characteristics: Intimacy, Passion, Commitment. Majority of the different kinds love includes, at the most, two characteristics. I thought of what kind of love could possibly include the three characteristics. At first, I thought there was none. But then I realized that the realtionship between an individual and God could possibly have that kind of love.

Regarding a relationship with the opposite sex, there are a few things I was able to reflect on. First was the issue regarding PDA or Public Display of Affection. Well, from the very start, I was very, very against it.Not for the reason na inggit lang ako. I'm not that shallow. But I disagree with it because, since they are in public, they are NOT supposed to be doing things that are supposed to be done in private! I remember one time when I was riding the LRT on my way home. There was this couple who had their arms around each other. If that was only what they were doing, it would seem alright. But the the guy would not stop kissing the girl, either on the cheeks or the lips. In my mind I was thinking, Hindi ba nila naiisip na ang daming tao sa paligid nila! Mahiya naman sila! But there are some cases where some forms of PDA is acceptable. Such as holding hands or when the guy places his arms around the girl. For the boys' opinion, PDA was okay as long as they are aware of their limitation.I guess I can agree, but I don't think all boys would have the same meaning of what their limitaion is.

I also reflected on the well-known issue regarding the relationship with the oppposite sex: Sex before marriage. I know a guy who said that in a relationship, it is somehow necessary to that they should do IT before marriage. It doesn't matter how long it would take, as long as they do it. The funny thing is, this belief of his got him to marry his girlfriend at the wrong time. All of the girls in the block said no to sex before marriage. We had different reasons. But the reason I had was that a guy should love his girlfriend, with or without having sex before marriage. But of course, the boys on our block had a different view on this. They know that if the girl doesn't want to do it, they shouldn't force them to. But when they are already in the "heat of the moment", there's no stopping them. haha! But there was also a time when I was thinking that Sex before marriage is okay, as long as you end up with the person you sleep with. But then, what if you don't? There's no way one could get their virginity back. That's why I believe that true love waits.

Fourth Entry: Us in the Future (probably)

For our fourth week, we were asked to come in class in a corporate attire. I got very excited waiting for this day, because it is out of the ordinary to be seeing my blockmates wearing polos/blouses, skirts/slacks, heels, necties, blazers, etc. The first thing almost everyone did was to take pictures (haha!). Then class started.

To start the class, we had a mini fashion show. Among the groups, we were supposed to pick 4 people to model their attire on our mini fashion show. I was one of the chosen people to model in front. I'm not really comfortable being in front if many people, especially when I'm supposed to be doing something I don't usually do. But since the people around me are people I already know, the activity wasn't really hard for me to do. I actually had fun! After the activity, we had disccussions.

The real purpose why we were asked to come in corporate attire was for us to somehow have an idea of what our future will be, and at the same time, observe proper behaviour as if we are already professionals.

In my opinion, as for my future, being in corporate attire is alright, but I don't see myself being in that kind of situation. I've always had the impression that getting a job involving programming doesn't need to be in corporate attire, since the only thing you have to face is the computer. If there is a need, it would only be occassionally.

Third Entry: Personal Etiqutte

On the start of our 3rd meeting for PerSef, we had an icebreaker. We played a different version of "Do You Love Me". Instead of asking "Do you love me?", we asked "Do you love your neighbor?". It was fun. Hiningal ako... hehe.

Well, anyway. The class discussion was after the ice breaker. So for this week, we discussed about personal etiquette. During discussion, I remembered one story that I read in a magazine, regarding the basic grooming for all, there was this one man who was very meticulous with personal grooming. As in he would really criticize how others look, especially when it comes to nose hair! haha... And especially that he is in a business, he gets to criticize a LOT of people. Of course, he doesn't say it in front of the person. He mentions it only to his wife. :D

I also remember reading about the "Dressing for Men and Women" - Sexy clothes are for Sexy people to be worn in Sexy places. This was really funny!... but true. I really don't like it when there are people who are wearing clothes that are showing too much. I would always remember what I and my Ate Shiela would say: Nagdamit pa siya! We would always react that way whenever we see those kind of people. I mean, that's why clothes are made - to cover your body! And besides, it causes insecurities. I remember before, I would always wish I was thin so I could also wear the clothes that I like. But now, I am able to find clothes that are COVER ME (as what clothes are meant for), fit me & define me, without making other people feel distracted.

Personal etiquette really matters, because this is where first impressions are taken from. If we want to be sociable, we have to give importance to our personal etiquette.

Second Entry: Moments

Last June 8, we had an activity what Sir Raffy called as "Banig ng Buhay". In this activity, we had to create a timeline showing the happy and sad times we had during our lifetime. I was very pensive doing this. I remembered all the things I've gone through. The events that stood out the most were the happiest and saddest, where both of these events happened in high school. It was also fun to think about what will happen in the future. For me, I will graduate college on the age of 21, get my masters degree on 23, have a steady and high-salary job on 25, be happily married and have a famliy 28, retire on the age of 60, and die on 65.

On the subect of death, we were asked that if we die, how do we plan it to be. I've always been scared of a painful death. Like those who die from sickness or accidents. That's why I wanted a death like those people who sleep and never wake up. Free fom pain. Although Sir Raffy pointed out that sudden death hinders you from saying goodbye to your loved ones. Unlike death from a sickness, since you are already expecting death, you have the chance to take care of "unfinished business" and say goodbye to everyone. I had second thoughts. Maybe I'll consider a painful death (from sickness) that's not THAT painful. haha!

First Entry: Game Of Life

Last June 1, 2007, in our PerSef class, we had an activity called "Game Of Life". On my perspective, the activity was supposed to test if we would think of others first or our selfish desires or wants. Just the same with life itself.

During the activity, our group tried to stick to the decisions of the group representatives. But as time passed by, we noticed that there were some who were not going along to what was planned. In the end, our group did the same. Although, our first intention was really to help every group from getting left behind, but it resulted the other way around. Everyone lost. Haha! Oh well. I guess that's what were supposed to realize. It is that pursuing your selfish desires doesn't necessarily mean that you really gain from it. There's always a downfall.